Deciding whether your partner’s behaviours are healthy or unhealthy is not always easy. In certain situations, behaviours might be okay. However, if the behaviour turns excessive, the behaviour might become problematic. Have a look at our ‘Healthy Relationships’ tip sheet as a tool to determine what behaviours are healthy and unhealthy in relationships https://rizeabove.org.au/tip-zone/healthy-relationships/ . Your partner looking at your social media from time to time when you post something is an okay behaviour. However, if your partner is constantly looking at your social media, checking to see who liked your photo or who you are friends with, this becomes an unhealthy controlling behaviour and is a form of emotional abuse.
These behaviours can sometimes be warning signs of potential increased abuse later in the relationship. These behaviours can be more subtle in nature such as stalking your social media, wanting to know where you are all the time or saying negative things about your friends and family. Take a look at pages 4 and 5 of our safety plan kit that describes warning signs in relationships https://rizeabove.org.au/tip-zone/safety-plan-toolkit/ . Kids Help Line also have some useful information around what abuse is to help consider if the behaviours you are seeing in your relationship are unhealthy https://kidshelpline.com.au/teens/issues/what-is-abuse .
You can also talk to a trusted adult about your relationship such as a teacher, parent, counsellor or other professionals. Getting someone else’s perspective who is outside the relationship can be beneficial and removes the secrecy around the behaviours. Have a look at our useful links tab on our website for support options https://rizeabove.org.au/useful-links/ .